“His file with his deepest love”

   Episode- 206 “His file with his deepest love”    Alisa’s POV:   I am searching for my belongings in Edwin’s room but nothing good sees to come to me.. I searched under the bed, in drawers of night stand… every shelf, every place.. where is it..… I am searching like a crazy person and my hands are still empty…. The only place where my things can be are his cupboard… I tried to open it but it’s locked… I cursed in frustration… but a sudden memory flashed in my mind, I saw a key in the night stand… but will it fit…  I prayed this key would fit…  I whispered, “Please fit” if it fits everything can change, I inserted the key and started moving it.. I heard the it open and almost jumped in happiness as I heard that tiny sound… I feel like some kind of agent … so proud…     … soon I pushed myself away from this small celebration and I started searching one side of the closet and it’s filled with clothes… his clothes, I touched it and was lost for a moment.. it smells like him…  I was holding the piece of cloth as if my heart lives in it, I wiped my tear and I reminded myself about the situation and quickly searched it and had nothing in my hand after the search.. I almost destroyed this half closet… I slide the cupboard door to look on other side… but I was stunned by the view inside it… what the hell….     I saw two dresses, why does he has women’s clothing in his closet… f*cking playboy.. I was angry and this made me look at those outfit with more concern and hate at the same time, if I am more accurate I saw them somewhere…. And my eyes landed on the tags, it still has tag’s on… I read the tag as I hold it between my fingers , it’s from my store…. Ahh.. Are they the same dresses Edwin bought that day from, he insulted me, called me ugly and said it was for Ruth… but it’s still untouched,,,, he never gave it to anyone then why did he get it,,, why does he still have them…. what is this man.. why is he so unpredictable and hard to understand…     Anyways,, I shouldn’t be thinking about that… I have more important things to do…… I looked for my things and found them at last, my passport and Visa, my wallet is also there…. I feel like I win a war… I checked the passport and smiled at I conformed it’s mine… I moved to take the visa and wallet but a file dropped, it was under my things…….. I checked my wallet and it still has my cards and some cash.. untouched… then I went to the file.. what is it…    I quickly picked it up to keep it  in its place like nothing happened, then I will sneak out… but something catch my attention, the file…. I flipped it  open, I saw my picture on the very first page with my details, from my name to my blood group, to my interests, it even has my school name, every school I changed as its name on it, my parents detail my family detail everything.. but why… this got me tensed, but the picture of me was from my high school when my hair’s use to be around my shoulder, tied in a pony… why is there these picture from all these years…     What is all this?... I flipped the page and saw more of my pictures, in those I was doing some regular things, there was note on that page, ‘she is so innocent and pure… that I want to treasure her, my heart is betraying myself… why do I feel for you Alisa Scott…. You are utterly dangerous for me’ what?... what is this.. dangerous?... me?...    I flipped the pages, each of them had some pictures or detail about me and a note which I clearly remember to be Edwin’s handwriting, it’s like a journal… I subconsciously sat on the bed.. I read a note ‘today, I ended those to tried to hurt her, they bully her, they made her cry for no reason… I would kill everyone who will treat her bad..’… he killed the bully.. Edwin killed my bully to help me.. that means he knew me before I know.. I thought it was in my parent’s house on a dinner… but he knew me from high school…. Then why did he insulted me when we first met…    Next page, ‘this week she was not bullies as I got the news… she seemed to be more relax… at least if I can’t show my love for her, I can make her comfortable by little efforts..’    I flipped the page again, I read, “So.. she likes ice cream when she is sad… but I noticed these marks on her neck even through these pictures.. they told me her mom hit her because of her sister…. Ahh,… she suffers.. I don’t feel god about it…” he knew about every single thing about me.. what is it…       On the other page, “I just return to see her after 2 days and first thing I did was went to see her secretly hiding my face.. seeing her from far away….she smiled at her friend … and it felt great to see her like that… I wanted go to her and kiss her.. but I will only bring her problem… and I can’t risk my grandpa’s efforts to waste because I like this girl…” I covered her mouth as I was out of words….     After few pages,     ‘she graduated today, I was not their but my men told me it went well… she must be happy I wish I can share those with her…. but I can’t…’    ‘she spend her birthday alone… like she does every year, I want to make efforts but I maybe put her in some danger if she caught attention….. but I heard her best friend got her a cake and they celebrated it alone in a apartment like a broke person.. when she deserves more’ he always remembered it.. Edwin you are making me cry and guilty.. why…    ‘today, I am proud of my little dove, yea I named her that, she is so pure that I need to do it… she got her first job… she must be excited…. I made sure to fire the old pervert from the company so she won’t be sexually abused.. that old pervert has his records.. I don’t want him to make her feel uncomfortable’… he done all of this though the years to protect me without coming out.. but never told me…why is he saying he needs to keep me face.. I know now he was always in danger….      ‘I met her today at her parent’s place… I knew she lives in the same area but I didn’t know she lived in that house, she approached me but threw water on her and said mean things…. I was hurt by her tearful eyes, but I had no other way to keep her away from me… how can I tell her I like her too.. I shouldn’t … I will stop her from coming to me…’ tear roll down even though I don’t want to cry…. But this didn’t stop me from reading further..       ‘today I agreed to her sister as he fake boyfriend… so just little dove would hate me… I hate myself when she is hurt… but I will do everything possible to keep her away from this…’      ‘I heard that she moved out… I am really worried, will she be ok all by herself….. that place is not good.. crime rate is more, I appointed some people  in her front door so I can insure she is safe…. I hope she doesn’t do something  stupid ’ I wiped my tears as my vision is blurring up… Edwin.. you crazy jerk.. you a**hole.. if you liked me all this time then why do you hide it…      ‘I have another proud day add to this list… my little dove opened her own store… she looked happy from those pictures… she must be working hard.’  I whispered as I flip the page, “Stupid jerk..” but I couldn’t hate him for this       ‘today I got attacked so I am ending this thing here… I am ending everything that calls me to give her attention… this attack was like a tight slap on my face making me understand, I shouldn’t drag her in this… I am stopping my feelings for you… from today… I would hate you the same way you do… I will try not to love you Alisa Scott.. I will hate you’      My tears were wetting my cheeks, I was on the last page… it had number of pages but still they were not enough to tell me that what I read was real.. I was frustrated I moved my hair away from my face…      I said to myself, “He like me for that long then… why… all this”