“I am responsible for her condition”

   Episode- 266 “I am responsible for her condition”    Edwin’s POV:    (3 MONTHS LATER)                              It’s almost been three month since I woke up, everything is back to normal in everyone’s life… but me….         I walk in the palace, with a bunch of flowers … they are her favorite… I walked to our room… I closed the door behind me. I smile as I see her, Alisa is still in coma… but she is with me, she on the bed with all the hospital equipments, I arranged few nurses.. her mother and my mom take care of her on the alternate days. I smile but I am hurt.. it hurts to see her like this.. she is in this situation because of me…  I walked to her and sat beside her  on the bed.. I placed the flower near her. I smiled and said, “Little dove… how was your day?” I know she won’t answer, just like every other day.    I still smiled and said, “Well I had pretty busy day, I wanted to punch them at one point… so I could come to you… I hope little one is not troubling you…” I touched her face, I kissed her lips lightly.. then I kissed her belly… I touched her forehead and said, “please talk to me… please… I say it every day.. but you never reply..” I chuckled through tears and said, “you got good with silent treatment…” I wiped my tear and said, “But it hurts… can’t you just wake up and scold me…” I heard a knock on the door.. I fixed myself and said, “come in…”    I saw mom and a female doctor. The doctor greeted me, mom said, “Edwin… she is here for regular ultrasound… you want to stay..”       I nodded as I said, “Yes.. why not..” the nurses assemble the machine, I got all the machines and other things needed as I shifted Alisa here.. I need to make sure I can have a track of all of this. I need to make sure she shows some progress in recovery..    Soon the process started, the doctor started the ultrasound.  I am nervous to be honest. Soon, the doctor turned to me and said, “Sir… everything is fine.. I see no problem in growth of the baby….” I sigh in relief.. I turned to   mom, she smiled… she said, “I just hope Alisa will be ok soon…” something strike in me.. I know mom feels the same as I do…..     Few days later….     I am working in my study, I check on Alisa.. she seemed to be no different from other days….. I feel ready broken as I see her, I don’t know how long I can go through this but seeing her like this is the last thing I ever wanted… she is in no sense to open her eyes… to liver her life normally… she has no sense of knowing that she is going to be a mother…. if I could have saved her that day… this is my fault.. no matter how much I try I can’t run from this fact… it’s haunting me…    I looked in the file again, I need to finish this… Alisa’s mom and nurses are talking care of her…. I am glad at last, her mother is treating her right….but I still don’t trust anyone near her… I just trust my mom, so my mom checks on Alisa when I am not near..        I heard a knock on the door, I said, “Come in…” I saw dad walking in, Dad is here…. he sat in front of me after passing me the coffee.. he smiled at me. he said, “How are feeling?”    I just replied, “I am ok.. but Dad.. Dad do you need anything…” he just smiled…… he looked at me for a wide second and said, “Don’t do this to yourself… I know you are worried about Alisa… then just sit near her… you don’t need to over work…”      I looked down, I can’t hide it anymore.. I am just worried about her.. maybe if I was quick enough then the situation would be complete different…    Dad said, “You need to think about Alisa and the child… if anything happens to Alisa while the childbirth or she never recovers from the coma… you need to be the one to take care of the child… even when we all hope Alisa will return back to normal.. but we can’t trust the destiny”    I said in instant, “she will recover one day… I know she will…” Dad nodded but I know he is worried about me. Dad smiled and said, “You need to worry about your health too.. don’t over work.. spend time with Alisa.. like before if it makes you happy… just don’t stress yourself… it’s not good.”     I confessed,  “I want to.. but I see her like this I can’t help but feel the guilt… she went through all this because of me.. first Ron died because of me… and now my Alisa… I unknowingly risk that babies life… I can’t explain what I feel… it’s really hard…” Dad pat my back, and then said, “Life is hard but you never intentionally hurt your love once… it’s just the test of life but we shouldn’t  give up… we need to face this hard time, we should be ready for the worst, and stay strong…”  I nodded… yes, I need to stay strong.. I deserve this pain, yea.. why I am trying to run away.. I need to face it beside her…..